How many times a day to we post on Facebook? Are all the updates explicitly about ourselves? Do we log on to Facebook seeking validation or instant gratification? If so, we may be revealing an ugly truth about ourselves. Facebook, dear friends, have made us all a little bit more narcissistic. Remember those once-popular, highly-shareable BuzzFeed quizzes? They worked fabulously because they played to our desire to share our own self-indulgence.
Or at least that is what Dr. Sylvia Gearing proclaims in this video on how to spot narcissism and self-absorption on Facebook.
“Since social media sites can be used as one big mirror, narcissist flocked to them,” says Dr. Gearing in the video below. “They delight in exhibit themselves. No detail of their lives is deemed unimportant.”
Gearing shares some clues on how to spot on Facebook narcissist:
2. Control over presentation: Facebook gives narcissists the tools to create the perfect image of themselves by untagging unflattering photos and comments.
3. Too much skin: what’s Dr. Gearing’s advice when we stumble upon an almost nude photo? “Run,” she says.
4. Constant updates: “over posting is a big sign of self-glorification and a very narrow life,” she continues.
5. Shallow relationships: it’s not humanly possible for our brains to keep up with any more than 150 social connections, so if a Facebook user has more than 1,000 friends they are probably mostly shallow relationships.
6. Narcissistic mirroring: self-absorbed people love praising other self-absorbed people because it creates a constant loop of praise and self-absorption.
Another interesting fact, male narcissists tend to use words to self-promote so look out for really long and outlandish “about me” sections. Female narcissists, on the other hand, resort to visual titillation, posting photos of them in sexy clothing.
“One or two pictures at the beach are ok, but when you are doing entire photo shoots with different outfits and hairstyles — there’s really something wrong with you,” says Dr. Gearing point blank. “Get a life.”
Recent studies have tracked the development of this new, so-called “Facebook narcissist,” one who is more readily able through social media to gain likes and followers to boost his own fragile self-esteem. It doesn’t matter if you are male or female, young or old. It all comes down to examining our motives for using social media, and how it plays directly into fueling our own flames.
p.s. Facebook is not the only social network where narcissism can thrive. Instagram and Twitter can also be breeding grounds for self-involvement.