Real Sex vs. Porn Sex

Here’s a sex lesson you can munch on during lunch.
Ever wonder the difference between real sex and porn sex? Well, it doesn’t take a sexpert to note major disparities, but sometimes the real difference can be very subtle. How can these differences be visualized in a safe-for-work video? By using everyone’s favorite sex-replacement: food!

The following informative video features peaches, celery and even two sausages in a bun engaging in some silly, sex behavior as a way to presents real-life sex statistics and dispel the sexual enhancements and stereotypes perpetuated by porn.

Here are the facts:

  • Porn star penises are 6-9 inches. Civilian penis fall short at 5-9 inches. Chop!
  • 75% of men ejaculate within 3 minutes. Champagne bottle pop!
  • 22% of women say they will take a hot load (of chocolate syrup!) in the face.

And for the 50 Shades of Grey quicker: 40% of civilians have tried light bondage. “Wait… that’s actually quite a lot,” says the narrator in her cheeky British accent. There you have it, porn facts so good you can almost taste them.

Oscar Raymundo
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